[.ca] Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need (ISBN 0345431138)

From Amazon.com:
Dave describes the dark side of tourism with such comical precision that you'll wonder why you ever bother to leave the safety of your living room. For my money, nobody has ever produced a better snapshot of the Baggage Carousel, "where passengers traditionally gather at the end of a flight to spend several relaxing hours watching the arrival of luggage from some other flight, which comes randomly spurting out of a mysterious troll-infested tunnel that is apparently connected to another airport, possibly in a different dimension."

You'll never leave home if you read this book:
It's a good thing that Dave Barry's travel guide is untranslatable into any language other than American. Otherwise we might have to go to war with all of those countries that he reported to be shaped like a large ketchup stain, or where he had to shell out 4,000 pfarthings to use the public restroom. Our author does not take such insults lightly. Nor does he expect you to. This guide is filled with such useful phrases as, "Mi (esposo, esposa) es been tramplado por toros," or "Tuo fratello Raoul dormi con los pesces." Luckily, according to Dave, many foreign people speak our language. "Stick them up!" they'll say. "Please to be handing over your American Express traveler's checks! Don't leave home without them!" There are lots of useful airline tips in this book, such as how to behave if your airplane is infested by demons, how to fit a lawn tractor into the overhead baggage compartment, and what do about the 475-pound man in the adjacent seat who has forearms the size of Roseanne. For those of you who are afraid of flying, the author very kindly takes time to explain how an airplane flies (I didn't know an airplane wing had ailerons AND halyards). Dave doesn't just do Europe. He also takes on the fifty states ('Massachusetts is an Indian word meaning "place that is hard to spell"), Canada (which "boasts numerous goose-infested lakes"), and Mexico ("Unit of Currency - The Lambada"). I can't help wondering whether this book had anything to do with the current state of relations between ourselves and our closest neighbors. Don't let your kids read this book right before a history or geography test, especially not Dave's highlighted "Facts at a Glance" boxes. Even I know that the unit of currency in Greece is not 'The Sheep." It's the 'minimum.'

Stressed by planning a journey? Read this book to relax!:
Traveling -- a blessing or curse? Reading "Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need" makes you asking this very question -- and then deciding to plunge head first into the next traveling adventure. Divided into an introduction, eight chapters, and an epilogue titled "Welcome Home! Or: 'That's Odd! Our House Used To Be Right Here!'," the book practically covers every aspect of traveling. A special treat are Dave Barry's descriptions of the fifty U.S. states and some European countries. Funnily enough, you often find yourself thinking: "Yeah -- it's exactly like that!" Or should that be scaring? No matter what, Dave Barry's hilarious travel guide is definitely one of a kind and will entertain every traveler -- and those who prefer to stay home.

Never leave home without it. Actually, never leave home.:
This is the ideal book for anyone who was been left frothing and screaming in a plane that is "experiencing technical difficulties," or someone who is being forced to view large wads of culture in a foreign city, or has been dragged to Disney World by a small child. Dave Barry unleashes his frustrated commentary on the travel world in general, in one of his most hilarious books ever. (In general, the more frustrated Dave Barry is, the funnier he is) He goes over various details of travelling, such as proper travel planning, travel checks ("A Lot of People Never Figure Out How to Cash Them"), car rentals, luggage ("... will hold two pairs of socks PLUS your dental floss"), and bribing nuns. Then we handle foreign languages, and he gives you a few useful phrases like "Sacre moo! Ce EST mon CHAT!" ("Holy cow! This \othe food\c IS my cat!"). Then it's air travel, where Barry vents his spleen on airport security, airport food, small children on planes, and tips for kids on how to have fun with security personnel. Then it's time for family fun, at Disney World where cheerful employees will make sure you have fun, or else. He also gives you tips on the fifty states of the US, useful info and plenty of trivia. (For example, the Florida state seal shows a mosquito with a machine gun, and Iowa's Official State Motto is "You Bet!") He also handles other North American countries like Canada (which has cold air masses) and Mexico (Unit of Currency: The Lambada). He also briefly forays to Europe, where he lampoons various countries in turn. (Instructions: How to use a bidet) Then it's staying in a hotel, and if that isn't awful enough, camping out. If you have a deep-rooted hate of airport security personnel, or you hate camping, or you hate being shortchanged in Austria, then this book is for you. Keep on writing, Mr. Barry, but you may want to rethink the book tours...

Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need:
Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need is a hilarious book! I started reading Dave Barry's pieces six months ago and he has never ceased to humor me; this book is no different. The book focuses on tourism in all 50 states, Canada, Mexico and several European countries. It is filled with numerous diagrams that are sure to make you laugh. Along with this is his own advice on vacationing, camping and other things. This book is very enjoyable with short sections to ease reading. The topics are so random and spurious that one could never get bored. The stories were also so down to Earth and real that I feel everyone can relate. For example Barry explains the baggage carousel we all no doubt have seen as a place, "where passengers traditionally gather at the end of a flight to spend several relaxing hours watching the arrival of luggage from some other flight, which comes randomly spurting out of a mysterious troll-infested tunnel that is apparently connected to another airport, possibly in another dimension." He takes an everyday occurence and turns it into a hilarious event. I would highly recommend this book to anyone seeking a different type of read or just some good laughs.

A classic!:
Quite easily one of the finest humor authors does it again! This is a hilarious account of traveling, not to mention a brief description of each U.S. state, and most European countries! Definetely recommended for anyone who knows a bit of history, or who travels a lot.