[.ca] Staring at the Sun: Overcoming the Terror of Death (ISBN 0787996688)

Interesting and thought-provoking, but limited in its practical effectiveness:
I can't think of any non-religious individual more qualified to address the terror of death, man's strongest and most natural fear, than Dr. Irvin D. Yalom. Having recognized that death anxiety is oftentimes at the root of his many patients' problems, he developed his own brand of existential psychology (even as the profession moved away from this type of approach) to help get to the root causes, no matter how hidden they might be from the surface, of many of his patients' problems. Basically, Yalom : Death :: Freud: Sex. The good doctor has also mined the thoughts and insights of many a great philosopher in formulating his psychological world view (his incredible novel, When Nietzsche Wept, is what introduced me to Yalom in the first place). There's also the fact that Yalom is now in his mid-seventies, an age at which you can't help but come to some kind of terms with your own mortality. Never one to isolate his professional self from his patients or readers, Yalom shares his own personal feelings and thoughts to an unprecedented degree in these pages. Fear of death is the one thing that unites all of mankind. Even our most idyllic days of childhood offer no immunity from it, as that is when most of us are forced to confront death for the first time - be it a grandparent, aunt, pet, etc. Granted, I have the kind of mind that seemingly begs to be someone's case study, but some of my earliest memories had me wondering if I might already be lying dead in my coffin, dreaming my life over again - and I have long predicted that I would die at 42 (I hope I'm wrong, since 42 isn't all that far away now). At least I, as a Christian, know that death is in no way the end; I can't really imagine how atheists could ever come to terms with the looming nothingness awaiting them in their graves. Since Yalom is such an atheist, I was most interested in seeing what he would have to say on the subject. The basic message I get from this book is that one must identity and then confront one's fear of death, for in doing so you can learn to appreciate life all the more. Yalom talks a lot about the positive correlation between one's sense of "the unlived life" and death anxiety, and it would certainly seem to be true that many individuals (including yours truly) let their fears hold them back from living life to the fullest. To hear Yalom describe cases in which people broke through their walls of fear to find a new and extremely passionate love for life is undeniably inspirational. His is an Epicurean philosophy, and Yalom shows how "eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow you may die" is a distorted and far too simplistic concept of his favorite philosopher's beliefs. Epicurus, Yalom tell us, believed the whole point of philosophy was to relieve human misery - and that a great deal of said misery was a product of the omnipresent fear of death. Yalom also emphasizes the concept of rippling as a counter argument to the often cited transiency of human life. The things we do and say will affect others on down the line long after we are dead and forgotten. Frankly, the concept of rippling doesn't do a whole lot for me, but it is the kind of argument atheists have to make in order to convince themselves that their lives are not inherently meaningless. Basically, Yalom tells readers that they can create their own fates, one which they can embrace rather than cower before in fear, and he offers examples of individuals who overcame debilitating death anxiety and emerged as happier, more alive men and women capable of living their lives and connecting with their fellow man in ways they could never have imagined. For my money, though, Yalom's own personal ideas and insights make for the most interesting reading. It's not every day that a leading existential psychologist grants us entry into his most personal and deepest thoughts. Does Yalom succeed in offering "specific methods" with which to battle death anxiety? No, not really, but I will say that I found the book fairly inspirational and thought-provoking. Still, Yalom's personal dismissal of any and all religious beliefs his readers (and undoubtedly a significant number of his patients) may have is a definite weakness that calls into question its ultimate effectiveness. Rooted in secular humanism, though, Staring at the Sun can only take the religious reader so far, for the utter finality of death is not an obstacle of death anxiety that we have to overcome.