[.ca] Beyond Sibling Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Become ... (ISBN 0805056890)

From Amazon.com:
Yes, your children can have better relationships than you and your siblings did, says author Peter Goldenthal. In Beyond Sibling Rivalry, Goldenthal, a practicing psychologist specializing in sibling and family relationships, provides thoughtful and informative theory and practice for easing this challenging element of family life. In many ways, Beyond Sibling Rivalry is a general positive-parenting text that teaches parents to learn their child's needs by paying attention to the child. Yet, for specific examples and issues, Goldenthal focuses on sibling relationships. In 12 chapters, the book moves from predictable and preventable conflicts (preparing a child for a sibling's arrival, conflicts about sharing, and knowing when to intervene) to rivalry's more challenging issues (such as recognizing it in all its forms and compensating for the challenges that ADHD brings into the home). Goldenthal bases his approach largely on famed psychiatrist Ivan Boszormenyi-Nagy's contextual theory--an approach that considers the entire family as the context for the sibling relationship and focuses on issues of fairness and justice to help resolve them. Goldenthal stresses the parental role in creating and encouraging sibling rivalry, encourages readers to examine their own sibling relationships, and teaches them how to stop encouraging competition between children by acknowledging individual talents and skills without comparison. Beyond Sibling Rivalry is a hopeful and proactive book. Goldenthal believes the ultimate cure for sibling rivalry is self-esteem and generosity, and the final chapters focus on facilitating empathy and altruism in your kids. --Ericka Lutz

Very insightful and helpful:
I found this book to be very helpful, and written in a clear, easy-to-read style. The author gave me a clear understanding of how to love each of my children "best". After reading this book the first time, I immediately put into practice many of the author's suggestions and saw immediate improvement in our family. I plan to read the book a second time, with a highlighter in hand, to really "digest" all of the helpful information. I am recommending this book to any of my friends or family who are going to have more than one child.

Very helpful book -- highly recommend:
This book not only gave me insight into my kids' relationships, but continues to help me to be the kind of parent I want to be. It's full of practical advice and I have seen quick results after applying what I learned. I am buying a few copies to give to friends with more than one child. Also a great gift idea for someone pregnant with a second child.

The best parenting book I have ever read!:
What I really like about Beyond Sibling Rivalry is that the examples in the book really hit home. Peter Goldenthal's suggestions were quite easy to follow. In the past week I have used some of his suggestions and I've noticed what a difference they make. Our children have been so much more helpful and nice to each other. It's a joy to watch! I recommend this book to every parent. It's probably the only parenting book you will ever need to read.

Our children are so much nicer to each other:
When I read the chapter about predictable and preventable sibling conflicts, the author wrote as if he had placed a camera in our home. So many of the situations were familiar to me. This book is an easy read for a busy mom, and the suggestions have been right on target.

Not bad ý but content in other books is more groundbreaking!:
The book jacket claims content to be a "groundbreaking look at sibling rivalry". But with subjects like "recognize and highlight each child's unique abilities and interests" and "use rewards and praise to encourage your children to be more cooperative", the book fell way short of my expectations for new or groundbreaking ideas. Although not alluded to in the title, the book "Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles" by Mary Sheedy Krucinka also addresses many sibling issues by helping families understand each other's temperament and communicate more effectively. A favorite section shows how to say or do things differently to avoid enraging others (i.e. a child who transitions easily may announce he's done playing and move on to the next game...leaving the slower-to-transition playmate in tears or outraged because there was no warning). She also offers tips to help children change their "bulldozing statements" (often button-pushing ones like "I'm not inviting you to my party!" or "Shut up!") into statements that persuade others to listen ("I didn't like what you said" or "I'd like a choice"). I'd recommend that book or "Siblings Without Rivalry" by Faber & Mizlash instead of "Beyond Sibling Rivalry".