[.ca] The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook (ISBN 1885408706)

From Amazon.com:
How to Wrestle Free from an Alligator: 4. If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (for example, a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Though it's being marketed as a humorous title--after all, it's unlikely you'll be called upon to land a plane, jump from a motorcycle to a moving car, or win a swordfight--the information contained in The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook is all quite sound. Authors Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht consulted numerous experts in their fields (they're cited at the end of the book) to discover how to survive various and sundry awful events. Parachute doesn't open? Your best bet for survival is to hook your arms through the straps of a fellow jumper's chute--and even then you're likely to dislocate both shoulders and break both legs. Car sinking in water? Open the window immediately to equalize pressure, then open the car door and swim to the surface. Buried in an avalanche? Spit on the snow--it will tell you which direction is really up. Then dig as fast as you can. Each survival skill is explained in simple steps with helpful illustrations. Most stress the need to be prepared--both mentally and physically. For example, to escape from quicksand, you will need to lay a pole on the surface of the quicksand, flop on your back atop the pole, and pull your legs out one by one. No pole? No luck. "When walking in quicksand country, carry a stout pole--it will help you get out should you need to." Hopefully you'll never need to know how to build a fire without matches, perform a tracheotomy, or treat a bullet wound. But in the words of survival evasion resistance escape instructor "Mountain" Mel Deweese, "You never know." --Sunny Delaney

Danger is my business, and business is good:
In my line of work, you have to know how to survive. From fending off sharks, escaping from killer bees, treating bullet wounds, to surviving poisonous snakes, danger is my business, and business is good. In The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook, Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht describe step-by-step instructions with pictures on dealing with the situations above, and many more. This 176 page book is broken up into five chapters, each dealing with situations of a particular vein. The first chapter, Great Escapes and Entrances, includes escaping from quicksand, breaking down doors, ramming cars, and escaping from sinking cars. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have to do that... Chapter two titled The Best Defense gives tips on dealing with bears, mountain lions, charging bulls, how best to take a punch and winning a sword fight. I once had to deal with a bear armed with a saber, so this chapter was especially handy, as I got to combine two skills into one. Chapter three discusses Leaps of Faith, or how to jump from things, onto things, and into things without hurting yourself. Ever see those movies where one person is chasing another on top of a speeding train? Now you can learn how to jump from train car to train car without completely destroying yourself because you fell between the cars and got caught under the ouchy wheels. I found chapter four, titled Emergencies, to be quite useful as I now know how to perform a tracheotomy. Forget that foolish Heimlich maneuver stuff..."Sir, are you choking?" Also learn how to use that cool hospital machine with the paddles that people always yell "Clear!" and then slap them on some unconscious person. The last chapter deals with Adventure Survival. What would you do if the pilot of the plane you were traveling in suddenly collapsed? Well, with the help of this book, you can land that baby in confidence. Parachute won't open? No problem...lost in the desert? Got you covered... Even though I make a lot of jokes, all the techniques listed within these pages are culled from expert sources in the various fields. There is even a forward written by "Mountain" Mel Deweese, a Survival Evasion Resistance Escape instructor. (I love to take a peek at his resume') All in all, a fun, quick, informative read that may give you the tools to save yourself from a dangerous situation someday.

SUPER FUN:
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Kill two birds with one stone!:
Turn otherwise wasted down-time into a great learning opportunity. Although there is no specific advice for how to kill two birds with one stone in the book, our bathroom guests have enjoyed learning about other survival situations while attending to their duties. A sturdy cover and compact size makes this book especially suited to a harsh bathroom environment. Highly recommended!

Instructions on day to day life, well maybe not day to ....:
This handbook gives the reader instructions on aspects of everyday life from how to deal with a snake bite to how to jump from a motorcycle into a moving car (something most people do quite frequently). How to hot wire a car or kick in a door is a must for any want to be criminal. Some of the things in here you're not real likely to use but it is interesting to read up on how they are done. Lot of things you're more likely to be taught the correct way when partaking in the activity itself by actual instructors such as what to do if your air tank doesn't work while scuba diving both for people never likely to partake in some of the activites in this book who may be interested in what if questions then this book can suffice. It is pretty unlikely you are going to whip this little book out of your pocket as you are plummeting to earth when your parachute doesn't open and things like that but this book is an interesting read on what the ideal thing to do is. A better book is the later version of this by one of the same authors of this book called The Action Hero's Handbook which also includes a lot of humour and acts as if the reader wants to be an action star in movies.

Buy only for the humor:
If you think this book can possibly save your life, you are kidding yourself. This book was written as a joke. For example, it gives advice on how to survive attacks by crocks and sharks. It says you should pounce on the nose of crocks and irritate the gills of sharks to free yourself. Now that is funny. It is funnier to see how some of the reviewers of this book think it will actually work! If anyone has been attacked by a crock and was able to free themselves by punching its snout, then please let me know. But I doubt it since they would not have survived.