[.ca] Below The Belt/Godson

Ellison Wonderland:
This DVD is only for diehard fans of producer Harry Novak or "actress" Uschi Digart. If you're not already a Novak fan, check out "A Scream in the Streets" or "Kiss Me Quick" (two of his greatest classics) first. As usual with Novak films, the rather bare plots are summed up in more than sufficient detail on the back cover of the DVD. Anything more would create a false impression of how much plot there is considering that what's there is just an excuse to show lots of women and some violence. Both films have the usual fun overacting, especially Buck Flower's performance as the punchdrunk former boxer in "Below the Belt". Unfortunately, the plots are even sparser than usual in these films, so consequently there is not quite as much of the unintentional humour normally found in Novak films, which renders these two weaker. But there is one surprise which earns this DVD an extra star for those who love spotting famous people doing things you can be sure they later regretted. In the case of "The Godson", the target of humour is Hugo and Nebula award-winning author, screenwriter and film critic Harlan Ellison. In most of his scene, which involves (sci-fi?) conventioners being entertained courtesy of the hilariously sideburned and afroed godson, you can only see Ellison's arms, but his face is clearly visible for several seconds and he is clearly enjoying himself. This scene was even shot in Ellison's home which is easily recognizable with the many bookshelves almost completely covering all the walls. The best way to watch this scene is after reading any of Ellison's many reviews blasting some fun turkey of a film for not living up to his lofty intellectual and artistic standards. The irony is delicious.

Decent Extras, But the movies are OUCH!:
Other than the lovely Uschi Digard sightings throughout this DVD, both "The Godson" and "Below the Belt" are unwatchable, even by B-Movie standards. The most redeeming feature (er, Uschi aside...) in the DVD is Jason Yukon in "The Godson," who looks like he's trying to pull off Robert Reed as "Mr. Brady gone Real Baaaad (and on a bummer of a trip!)" The only thing funnier than Yukon's perm and groovy duds is his too-cool way of talkin' to the ladies (picture Conan O'Brien when he does his Pseudo-Cool voice!). If you want to get a complete glimpse of either of these films, try to find their trailers on one of the great "Something Weird Video" compilations. That way you can drink in the 1960s Kodachrome-Color and the bad delivery & fashion, without trashing over an hour of your time! If you are one of the Uschi Digard fans out there, this DVD might be worth the $$$. She is featured in liberal doses throughout both films. Plus, the two featurettes focus entirely on her, including her way-out rendezvous with Count Dracula at a Boating Marina IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!?!?! They even share a Coca-Cola. Voluptuous visuals do not get stranger than this! Otherwise, Mike Vraney & Co at "Something Weird Video" have so many DVDs superior to this one in their library. Wave 'bye to this one and keep on shoppin'!

Wanton Women , Wide Collars and Wigs:
This Harry Novak double feature has a mobster and Uschi Digart motif. "The Godson," directed by William ("Mantis in Lace") Rotsler, is the better of the two features. As a mob boss's godson, Jason Yukon has ambitions of doing more than overseeing the syndicate's prostitution operations, setting up women like Maria Arnold to advance his position. The true focus of this movie, however, is lots of simulated sex. Enter Uschi Digart, who shows off her ample bosom and sweet smile while flopping atop a john. Other giggling starlets include Jayne Allison, who wears a vapid smile (and little else) even though her sister was just murdered in a prior scene, and Orita de Chadwick (who moved on to hardcore movies). As entertaining as the softcore sex is, the fashions and the hair steal the show --especially the hair. Yukon, with his permed helmet, looks like Gary Shandling playing Mike Brady. The woman playing the madam wears a wig--and I hope for her sake it was a wig--that I can only describe as a red bouffant mullet (a bouffullet?). Lois Mitchell, who writhes naked through the opening credits as well as writhing beneath the woolly Yukon, changes hairstyles dramatically within a single scene. Another "actress" doesn't even bother to tuck all of her own hair beneath her cheap black wig. And the guy who plays her john (his name isn't listed, but he's a familiar--and unattractive--face in '70s softcore) appears to wear a wig as well. Also look for John ("Midnight Plowboy") Tull, in a small, fully-clothed, but pivotal, role. And with his own hair. Tull and Digart return for "Below the Belt," which is supposed to be set in the world of boxing, but really, it's set in and around someone's Southern California home. Tull, not looking his best, is a bi-polar bully, Sammy, managing boxer Johnny (Steven Hodge). Though Hodge looks like he'd be more adept at rolling joints and playing pinball, he attracts the attention of gangster Louie Gardino, perhaps the worst-dressed mobster ever (and following the cast of "The Godson," that's saying something). Gardino tries to get control of Johnny by offering him Lisa (played by Mirka), but Johnny is a girl-shy virgin. And an imbecile, which is why, at the movie's opening, Sammy is able to steal Digart away from him in less than 30 seconds. In fact, Sammy gets all the women in this movie. The only women to escape Sammy's psychotic seductions are those who turn to other women, like gap-toothed Terry Johnson (check out her peeling back when she's going... *with* Mirka). "Below the Belt" has some amusing moments, and a few people, like Tull, try to act. Overall, though, it makes "The Godson" look like, well, "The Godfather." Directed by Bethel Buckalew, it actually makes the director's Southern sex comedies ("Country Cuzzins," "The Pigkeeper's Daughter") seem like sophisticated filmmaking by comparison. But there's all that sex to help salve the lack of cinematic finesse. Extras include trailers for "Bust Out" (a.k.a. "Convicts Women"), "A Scream in the Streets," "The Manhandlers" and two for the same movie under different titles, "Up Your Alley" and "Bang! Bang! The Mafia Gang." There are two Uschi Digart shorts as well. One, "Uschi Meets Dracula," is total silliness, only featuring her "talents" in one brief scene as she changes clothes in a phone booth (and flashes George "Buck" Flower). The other, a peepshow loop, will be more satisfying to her fans as it shows her every curve, mound and crevice.

Extras Are Okay, But the Movies....OUCH!:
Other than the lovely Uschi Digard sightings throughout this DVD, both "The Godson" and "Below the Belt" are unwatchable, even by B-Movie standards. The most redeeming feature (er, Uschi aside...) in the DVD is Jason Yukon in "The Godson," who looks like he's trying to pull off Robert Reed as "Mr. Brady gone Real Baaaad (and on a bummer of a trip!)" The only thing funnier than Yukon's perm and groovy duds is his too-cool way of talkin' to the ladies (picture Conan O'Brien when he does his Hepcat-voice!). If you want to get a complete glimpse of either of these films, try to find their trailers on one of the "Something Weird Video" compilations. That way you can drink in the 1960s Kodachrome-Color and the bad delivery & fashion,without wasting over an hour of your time! If you are one of the Uschi Digard fans out there, this DVD might be worth the $$$. She is featured in liberal doses throughout both films. Plus, the two short featurettes focus on her, including her way-out rendezvous with Count Dracula at a Boating Marina IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!?!?! They even share a Coca-Cola. Voluptuous visuals do not get stranger than this! Otherwise, Mike Vraney & Co at "Something Weird Video" have so many DVDs superior to this one in their library. Wave 'bye to this one and keep on shoppin'!