[.ca] Tough Guys Dont Dance

From Amazon.com:
Tough guys don't dance--and tough authors can't direct. Or at least that was the case with Norman Mailer and this mid-1980s potboiler. An overheated murder mystery obviously written for the money, the book became Mailer's return to moviemaking (after his quixotic efforts in the mid 1960s). This one, which stars Ryan O'Neal, is about a writer whose excessive drinking means he can't remember if he committed a murder and so must talk to everyone he knows to find out. Unfortunately, even with a cast that includes Isabella Rossellini, Lawrence Tierney, and Clarence Williams III, all of that talk doesn't make for an interesting movie. --Marshall Fine

One of the Finest Films Ever:
Disregard all the negative reviews! Whatever Mr. Mailer's intentions, this film contains some of the funniest dialogue in cinematic history! Nearly every line is a classic. Examples: "Lonnie's dead! Jessica is dismembered! Patty Loraine's off on some kind of a toot! And I'm about to go into business with you two unbelievable sleazos!" - Wardley Meeks Police chief: "I believe that you love your wife." Ryan O'Neal: "No more than twice a week." O'Neal: "What makes surgeons happy? To cut people up and get paid for it. That's happiness." In addition to the dialogue, Tough Guys Don't Dance boasts fine photography that evokes the light and atmosphere of Provincetown, some of the wackiest characters this side of a John Waters comedy, and a labyrinthe plot that rivals Chandler's The Big Sleep in terms of complexity and utter confusion. See it now! Before the ghosts of Helltown invade your seance!

Oh boy is this bad:
I didn't hate the novel like most folks did. in fact, I like it. Just takes a bit to get going. This movie. . . well, don't waste your money and time. that's the best thing I can say. Disappointing.

Deep six the one-star reviews!:
If "offbeat noir" is your clarion call, this is your movie. (Our one-star reviewers completely missed the bus to Irony on this one). Written and directed by iconoclastic writer Norman Mailer, "Tough Guys Don't Dance" is assured cult status,now that it is available on DVD. Ryan O'Neal gives a deadpan performance reminiscent of his work in "The Driver". O'Neal plays an inscrutable ex-con with a conniving "black widow" for a wife, who experiences five "really bad days" in a row, involving drugs,kinky sex,blackmail and murder. Due to some temporary amnesia,however,he's not sure of his own complicity (O'Neal begins each day by writing the date on his bathroom mirror with shaving cream-keep in mind, this film precedes "Memento" by 13 years!) Veteran film noir icon Lawrence Tierny (cast here 5 years BEFORE Tarantino thought of resurrecting him for "Reservoir Dogs") is priceless as O'Neal's estranged father, who is helping him sort out events (it's worth the price of admission alone to hear Tierny bark "I just deep-sixed two heads!"). Equally notable is a deliciously demented performance by B-movie trouper Wings Hauser as the hilariously named Captain Alvin Luther Regency. Norman Mailer's "lack" of direction has been roundly criticized, but his minimalist style actually works perfectly for the story, giving his movie a David Lynch feel (although that might be due to the fact that Isabella Rossilini is in the cast and the soundtrack is by Lynch stalwart Angelo Badalamenti!) Film fans who also happen to be LITERATE (i.e., those who actually READ) will eat this one up.