Saving Milly: Love, Politics, and Parkinson's Disease ... (ISBN 034545197X)

Amazon.com Review:
Morton Kondracke chronicles his wife's 13-year battle against Parkinson's disease with the same attention to nitty-gritty details and shrewd understanding of how power works that distinguish his political commentary. Kondracke doesn't airbrush how horrible it is to have Parkinson's (the squeamish should avoid the passages about Milly Kondracke's two rounds of deep-brain surgery), or how difficult it is to live with someone who does (the mere recitation of his caretaking activities will exhaust most readers). He provides unvarnished accounts of the battles among members of the Parkinson's Action Network and other disease activists competing for limited federal research funds, until they got real and decided to fight to double the National Institutes of Health's budget so everyone would get more money. And he refuses to offer a feel-good ending charged with false hope; the book's closing pages include a grim account of the Kondrackes' discussions about what to do if she becomes unable to swallow. (They settled on refusing the feeding tube and allowing her to starve to death, which "is not painful if the patient doesn't take liquids.") Offsetting this bleak material is a vibrant, loving, and equally candid portrait of the indomitable Millicent Martinez Kondracke, who began up-ending the admittedly self-absorbed, drivingly ambitious Kondracke's life from the moment they met in 1966. He'd planned to marry an Ivy-educated heiress who could further his career; instead he was swept away by a Mexican Jewish American firebrand who challenged authority on everything from a botched car repair to the school system's poor handling of their daughter's dyslexia. Seeing how powerful she once was, we share her anguish as she descends into disability--and her husband's hope that, despite all the current scientific projections, research will provide a breakthrough in time to save Milly. --Wendy Smith

Extremely moving story about a couple and their struggle:
Morton Kondrake's book is about much more than his wife Milly's Parkinson's disease. It's also about their life together, their marriage, the differences that caused friction between them, Kondrake's struggles in his career and those to overcome his own weaknesses, including, for a time, alcoholism. What emerges is a story of quiet heroism, both his and Milly's, as she defies the odds and continues to prove that her will to live is greater than her despair. Kondrake also writes about the politics of research and fundraising for various diseases, and how some diseases have more cache than others, even if the disease garnering more print and air time afflicts far fewer people than other devastating ailments. This may not come as a shock to people but it is still important so that we can all do what we can to campaign to make disease research and funding more equitable. I was most touched by Kondrake's unsparingly honest account of his own shortcomings as a man, a husband, and father, and how Milly, and eventually, her Parkinson's disease, made him grow into a far greater man than he was before. The fact that this is a true account makes this book very significant, and more moving than any fiction could be. It's impossible not to read it without tears.

Why I Will Never Complain Again:
Reading this book was like sitting at a kitchen table and letting Mort just pour his story out over a cup of coffee (like Mort, I am a recovering drunk so we can't do it over a beer). His is a story of passion, love, commitment and clear proof that there is nothing in my life I can ever complain about again. Millie is an extraordinary woman, her struggles with life, faith and Parkinson's come alive in this real narrative. You can't help but feel her pain, and Mort's immense love and commitment to her. I have always liked Kondracke as a pundit - I am a liberal republican, he a conservative democrat. We share similar feelings about nearly every issue except who we are most likely to initially vote for in a Presidential race. His struggle to get government officials to hear his plea for funding pissed me off - and I am sure you will share his frustrations in the reading. Most critically, you will absolutely be moved by the openness, honesty and devotion in this story.

Saving A Friend:
I had known Milly Kondracke for a quarter of a century before her death last year of Parkinson's disease. She was my mentor. Morton's memoir of their marriage is touching, well-written and a quick read. My only regret is that Morton glossed over Milly's wonderful gift as a social worker/therapist in a paragraph, for that was her career identity. Milly did her own mourning when she had to cease her private practice due to her illness. Still the book gives you a taste of her personality, one of those persons who were larger than life. "Saving Milly" achingly illustrates the struggle of a family who must care for a loved one through a long term illness and raises the question of politics, funding and ethics for those with incurable illnesses. I highly recommend this book.

Outstanding interview + reader's guide in paperback edition:
Paperback includes both a reading guide and a compelling interview with Kondracke by his comrade, Fred Barnes. In particular, it is interesting to learn about what Kondracke wishes he had done a bit differently in telling the story. In a sense, Kondracke stands outside the story to evaluate how faithfully he told it, an extraordinary exercise. Maybe this book is less about Milly and more about "saving Milly" and what that meant: pragmatically, socially, politically, spiritually. It's a useful distinction to bear in mind. There is some background information about this brave and lovely woman, but inasmuch as the topic is an encounter with a disease she has, this is not a biography of Milly. It is a picture of sickness and its impact: not of the woman, herself. There are plenty of books about people with illness: fewer, by far, about the very flawed, though devoted, individuals who care for them. Kondracke seems no longer to flinch at the shadows of his inadequacy and pomposity, which might encourage the reader to consider a similarly brave examination of conscience. Many of us will be called to be caregivers. This is no map, but it is a clear narrative of costs, rewards, pain, and delight that bubble up in the dynamic between cared-for and caregiver. I liked the book a lot and absolutely recommend the paperback edition because of its additions.

Saving Milly, a Parkinson's Story:
Excellent book, well written. Anyone who has, or is spouse or friend of someone with Parkinson's should read this book. It will make you cry and then make you mad, really mad. The U.S. Government should read it and see how poorly funds are distributed for aid and research. It's a shame.