December's Song: Handling the Realities of Grief (ISBN 0898402107)

A Rose is a Rose, Now & Forever.:
James Barrie, who wrote 'Peter Pan,' gave us this thesis, "God gives us memories so we might have roses in December." A beautiful red rose placed on a musical score of a hymn caught my attention as I looked for seasonal books to review. Written by the author of 'Roses in December' about the deaths of her three children, this follow up telling how she handled the realities of grief is described as "a melodious score written for bereaved singers confronted with the dissonant chords of grief, a sweet song of hope and encouragement to others who face the confusing noisy music of a loved one's death." Christmas is the hardest time to have to re-live the good times and memories of people close to us who are no longer there, whether by death or desertion. It is a stressful time, even in the best of circumstances. As I watch the snowflakes outside my window, I ponder about how long it will take Zach and Mark to come to grips with the fact that Tristan won't be coming back, nor will Mark's much-loved mother, both who died in 2005. Often our December song becomes a song of despair and futility, and we're tempted to linger in a bottomless pit of hopelessness. I gave up a dead-end way of life for the wrong purpose. It's hard to start over but, in time, our woeful song of stress can be transposed into a song of strength. As stress is reduced and preventative measures are taken so as to look beyong December, and see others' pain, depression will decrease and disappear. Deal with it step by step, and December's song of despair will become a song of peace. Suffering is a universal experience. For some, the pain lingers and may fester if kept inside. She uses songs for each chapter from a familiar song to a new song for the thirteen sections, from the hurting to the healing for the four groups. She explains how some people choose to sing a song of rebellion, like Zach, but others sing a new song of surrender, like Mark. You can take the old song which was sung in a minor key and transpose it into a harmonious melody. No one else can do it for you. After you survive the pain, fear, despair, anger, confusion and loneliness, a supernatural peace can be yours. As you turn those negatives into the positives of strength, peace, freedom, power and hope, December becomes festive again. That's when we celebrate the birth of "Mary's boy child."