I, Goldstein: My Screwed Life (ISBN 1560258683)

Readers get screwed:
What a disappointment this book was, and what a mess. After finally making it through this book, it became apparent that I had wasted my time. What should have and could have been a dozen-page magazine article has been made into a lengthy book made up mostly of filler. The result was an unreadable mish-mash of old, made-up, unbelievable stories. If Al Goldstein is a legend, it's in his own mind only. This text makes him sound pathetic, and it's his own autobiography! I wonder if he even wrote any of it. After buying this book, I was the one who felt screwed, and not in a good way.

An Authentic Autobiography:
Among the most outrageous of our contemporary American outlaws, and among the funniest, is Al Goldstein, the co-founder and lightning rod for the infamous, gleefully tasteless semi-underground sex tabloid _Screw_, which he describes as "the most notorious, uproarious, and influential pornographic newspaper in the world". Through his publication (and through his cable television show "Midnight Blue") Goldstein chronicled any sort of sexual story, and maintained a forum for his famous editorials which were the prose equivalent of a raised middle finger to politicians, religious leaders, feminists, and to any lawyer, restaurateur, movie producer, or airline who happened to irritate him. ("Irritate him"? That's not the phrase Goldstein would use.) He became a multimillionaire, and a celebrity, and it was a wild ride through the 34 years of publishing his magazine. He descended, however, back to rags from riches as the lawsuits and divorces took their toll. He has now written (with Josh Alan Friedman) the autobiography _I, Goldstein: My Screwed Life_ (Thunder's Mouth Press), a foul-mouthed, absurd, ribald, and thoroughly entertaining account of an influential life that may truly be called unique. Goldstein had trouble with girls when he was growing up: "My façade of amorality and detached sex has always been a cover for being afraid of being hurt. So what else is new. _Screw_ was such an antiromantic publication as compensation for that." He became a photojournalist like his father, and was working on a free press paper in New York when he met the straitlaced Catholic who would co-found _Screw_. The first issue came out in 1968, and by the time of Goldstein's first arrest, it was outselling _Time_ and _Playboy_ on Manhattan newsstands. He enjoyed the thrill of being arrested and disturbing the status quo of the state. "Acceptance of _Screw_ would be the kiss of death." He had a good time, and there are plenty of funny stories here. When the Polish Pope visited New York, _Screw_ reported that he was making a tour of public bathrooms. The Polish pressmen who printed the magazine walked out, but "I'm prepared for printer walkouts at all times, and the plant brings in an alternate crew of Puerto Ricans. Or Italians or Slavs or whichever ethnic group is not too offended to handle that week's subject matter." Goldstein's fall was precipitous, landing him in homeless shelters and at the prison at Riker's Island, which sounds straight out of the third world. "I've burned bridges. I have regrets," he says, and chief among these is losing contact with his son, who having been put through Harvard Law School with the aid of the pornographer's millions, has nothing now to do with his father. Goldstein mentions, with little trace of bitterness, one celebrity or pal after another that severed all connection with him once the money was gone. He also mentions with gratitude the friends who gave him money, or the restaurateurs who gave him free meals ("But I had to go early to make the homeless shelter by eight to sign for my bed"), or magician Penn Jillette who pays the rent for his Staten Island apartment. He is unrepentant, but he is disgusted by porn films of today, which he says are meaningless, with no tension, surprise, or human characterization. "Is this to be my legacy?" he asks, "I never dreamed I'd ever say such a thing, but is there no taste?" He had, however, previously written, "Each weekly issue of _Screw_ is one more strike against the world. If I ever lose it all, I'll merely shrug, amazed to have even gotten so far." He might think of his book as yet another such strike. Crude, buoyant, angry, and funny, it is possibly as authentic as any autobiography can be.

Modern Masterpiece:
Regardless of what you think about Goldstein as a person, he was nothing if not a freedom fighter and this wonderfully-written work expertly captures the essence of what it is to be Goldstein. None reading this review, it can be assumed, have ever faced as many horrible twists of fate as Goldstein--Divorced five times, constant medical problems and the squander of his fortune--all the while being relentlessly pursued by the law enforcement machine. Yet the book comes across not as a tragedy, but as more of a dark comedy (although "dark" may be an understatement.) Readers will also be thankful for the enlistment of co-writer Josh Alan Friedman, a veteran writer of the New York smut industry, who masterfully weaves Goldstein's stories, quips and one-liners into a genuinely readable and fascinating story. Love him or hate him, this book will probably not change your mind about Goldstein himself--it offers little in the area of redemption or remorse. All it offers is a look inside the life of one of the most colorful and controversial characters in American history, and in that it succeeds admirably. When future scholars study American freedom-fighters like George Washington, Paul Revere and Martin Luther King, "I, Goldstein: My Screwed Life" will be the reference they will use for this generation's one true revolutionary. God help us.

OK Read:
Well, this book was pretty much what I expected. Al Goldstein had it all and lost it all and he is brutally honest about it all. Instead of putting a gun to his head and ending it all he chooses to go on with whatever he has left which is not much compared to what he had. I applaud him for keeping one foot ahead of the other when he could probably just watch his TV all day (which is his favorite pastime). Goldstein is very funny and very ethnic (Jewish). He reminds me of the old school jews who sat around South Beach before it became chic and Coney Island and Kibitzed all day long.I enjoyed the stories he tells about growing up around the Dodgers in Brooklyn. He sounds like a few of my great uncles who constantly still talk of the day the Dodgers left Brooklyn. He really is just an ordinary guy who had a vision and became a symbol in pornography with screw magazine. I would recommend this book to anyone who would like to read about the evolution of Screw. Al, your a pioneer and a rouge keep up your blog on booble.com. We still need to hear your voice out there since there is no one with any balls to tell it like it is anymore.

Better then God.....................:
I been a big fan of scew magazine. I use to subsribe to it as well. Love the way big Al use to put people down. I've been waiting for years for his book, of his life. I have to say Al Goldstein is a very brave, smart, and telented person. Would make a great president. Hopfully more people would buy his book, give him the respect he deserve. Thank you Al for fighting for our freedom.